Battle of the Sexes is Bogus

2 09 2009


Boy meets girl, girl meets boy…the union begins between them.  The question remains how long will the unity last?  Or was there any to begin with?

Dating and relating seem complicated.  Or do we make it more complex than it really is.  Most say men and women are SOOOOO different.  Really?  I beg to differ.

We are all human.  At the very core we all are made from the same substance.  We ALL need love to survive.  Its even proven scientifically.  Leave a baby unloved, untouched and neglected in its formative years and the baby will die, even when fed and given water.  Love is the binding ingredient that allows us to thrive here in this physical reality.

So why do we think we have a “battle of the sexes”?  Men are human, and women are human.  We desire the same fundmental necessities to survive.  We may just communicate differently, have different inclinations and interests.  But in the end we are all one.  Well according to eastern philosophy. 

Yoga means union in its most basic definition.  Uniting forces, energies, souls and love.  We seek to find “unity” in our practice, in our careers, our finances, and most importantly in our relationships.  But what does union mean in the context of a relationship? Do we unite with the other and lose our ownselves in the process?  Do we unite on conditions and terms to make the other happy?  Do we form a ‘union’ because we feel alone, lost or empty?  This is when we must stand back and truly contemplate whats happening in our relationships.

The yoga or union of a relationship is never based on conditions. Yogic  union is a coming together of energies and souls, synergistically and harmoniously.  This is all possible while still remaining connected to our own union with the self and its internal guidance system.  The moment we deny that internal system which tells us PRECIOUS truths, we go against UNION, or the yoga we seek in loving, fulfilling and awesome realtionships.



Our internal guidance system is often our best guardian to solving the so called complexities and problems in life.  How you feel when you go inwards and reflect what is there, is never a lie.  Bring that brillance into your relationships and then you have UNION or Yoga within it.

Find UNION with your soul first.  Enhance it, cultivate its energy, and LOVE it.  For in this we enable ourselves to open to the possibility of sharing that with others.  In finding the love there within the very core of you, you find the real , and greatest part of your existence.  The blessings begin when you share that with others.  SHARE more and more of it.  This enables the UNION we look to achieve with a partner and potential mate. 

Begin by looking inwards. Ask yourself the following:

  • How do you respect yourself?  What actions do you take to love yourself on a consistent basis? 
  • If you can’t love and respect yourself, you will have a hard time doing that for others. 
  • If you lie to yourself, how can you be true to your partner?
  • If you abuse yourself with self deprication, drugs, smokes, alcohol or food how can you love another? 
  • If you deny the REAL YOU and just aim to please your partner to gain acceptance, how can you expect them to be the REAL them? 
  • If you can’t forgive your own mistakes, faults or plain humanity, how will you accept their humaness? 

Remember in the process of loving yourself no one else is harmed, hurt or disrespected.  Loving yourself means having enough compassion and forgiveness for our mistakes as well as those of others.  It’s sometimes the hardest thing to forgive another you feel has wronged you.  But the FREEDOM in that is MASSIVE, and priceless.  Forgiveness heals, and UNIFIES all. 

So yoga or union of relationships requires forgiveness for self and other.

Go deep within yourself to feel that ability to love, give and share. Then consider sharing that with someone who resonates with you. 

There is no battle of the sexes. That is media hype to sell books and movies. 


The battle is  with going inwards and finding the answers within.  We look externally, GRASPING at anything we can grab for the answer to our desire for happiness. When the union must begin from within.  When the grasping should be of our inner core and its infinite source of guidance and love.  We seek to blame the other, hurt the other, and neglect the basis of all harmonious UNIONS.  Which is love.  And that love begins at home. 

Your inner home.  Go there find it, and then without conditions share that with another.  This is the true yoga of relationships.  It starts within. 



Travelling Yogi





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